Nylander can do this forever; Bell should have played hockey

William Nylander got what he was worth, proving that Le’Veon Bell picked the wrong sport.

Nylander and the Toronto Maple Leafs ended an unnecessary hella-long-for-no-good-reason hold out that ended with Nylander signing a 6-year deal for an average salary for $ 7.5 million a year.

The numbers for Nylander are nice, but they not crazy. He’s only 22 years old but its easy to make the argument that the Leafs overpaid for a dude who only had 20 goals last season on a team that is surprisingly good for the first time since I lost my virginity. (What’s more lame, the fact that I used the first time I got some booty as way to measure time or the fact that the Maple Leafs haven’t made it past the first round of the playoffs since 2004?)

The goal total alone doesn’t show his worth, but if he keeps up those assist numbers and ends up playing on a line with Austin Matthews,and Patrick Marleau, its about to get dark for a lot of goalies outchea.

So, the 22-year old Nylander can get his bread based off potential and Bell is having trouble getting paid because of his potential to fall off harder than Nas after he dropped I Am. (I’m cracking this joke because I’m betting on there being no overlap between Hockey Twitter and Defend Nas at All Costs Twitter.)

Bell is better at his job than Nylander is at his at this point in their careers but even though it pains me to say it about a nigga younger than me, Bell is getting old at 26.

Nylander can make it do what it do with the assist numbers for another 10 to 15 years if he stays healthy. For Bell *Bust Rhymes voice* There’s only five years left. By the time a running back hits 30, its a wrap and you just hope they don’t show up looking hobbled at a public appearance 10 years after they retire in a way that makes you question if your consumption of the NFL is ethical. (Answer: It Ain’t and yeah, you gonna keep watching.)

Bell messed up early on  in life when he chose football. Someone should have put a pair of skates on him to save him from playing a position where you get the most amount of physical punishment and relatively little praise for your individual efforts.

I know it sounds crazy, but Nike already showed us that football s skills translates directly to hockey.

 

(Ok, that commercial doesn’t prove my point but I’m always looking for a reason to reference a video that shows Mike Vick’s black ass wearing an Avalanche uniform getting ice time with Joe Sackic.)

I get why the Steelers didn’t want to pay Bell as good as that offensive line is. Both sides in that hold out did what they had to do and the time away from football even gave Bell some time to get in the studio and work on his mix tape because we don’t have enough Sound Cloud rappers.

The team that pays Bell his money isn’t going to be a team with great offensive line. The team that gets the most value out of Bell will be the team with average run blocking that can’t really get things poppin with an average running back.

And when you take into account how much punishment comes with that position, maybe taking a year off to get his bars up isn’t the worst career moves.

Pittsburgh not paying Bell makes sense on some levels but Toronto not paying Nylander is just weird. They was probably looking ahead at having to pay Matthews and Mitch Marner down the line and wanted to save a couple of dollars on a top line that could get hella expensive down the line.

Having to break the bank on your top forwards isn’t a problem as long as they play like your top forwards. Dude is barely old enough to buy a drink. The contract could end up being a pretty good value by the time he actually gets into his prime.

I know Bell is trying to take himself semi-seriously with this rap thing but he’s got enough down time to work on his stick handling and learn to skate if he’s not feeling this football thing anymore.

The NHL has always needed a player with braids and if you say you wouldn’t turn on your TV to watch the Nylander-Matthews -Bell line in action you a mothafuckin lair.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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The “looks like” scouting report

Lamar Jackson threw for over 9,000 yards in three seasons,  won a Heisman and did so behind an offensive line that was negligently bad for most of his  college career. So it makes perfect sense that after all his success as a quarterback that teams would want to draft him as a wide receiver.

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